Think I Have Found the Wagon Again.

Okay so I disappeared for awhile, my computer crashed and then thing after thing happened.  In that time I was able to maintain my sugar free lifestyle for a bit, then I fell off the wagon.  Actually I lost the wagon.  This reminds me of a passage from "Sugar Blues," by William Dufty, "...The difference between sugar addiction and narcotic addiction is largely one of degree.  Small quantities of narcotics can change body-brain behaviour quickly.  Sugar takes a little longer..."  It struck me because when I started on the sugar again every seemed fine, normal really.  I continued my day, telling myself it was just a slip and I would get past it.  My day continued and late that night as I was going to bed I had developed hives all over my feet and hands.  Although I knew it was the sugar, I remained in denial and continued.  The first day began with a carrot muffin and some zucchini loaf.  Small, nothing majour but it lead to the hives, a sleepless night and a full on binge.  Next came doughnuts, then triple chocolate doughnuts, then a full on binge of doughnuts.  It was as though I couldn't stop.  I didn't eat them all at once but one in the morning, another in the afternoon, another at night.  Disgusting really and the hives continued.  I have literally ripped holes in my feet scratching.

So as we stand now, I am looking for the wagon to get back on.  While I was off sugar people kept telling me that I looked good, lost weight and that my complexion was looking good.  I'm lucky I don't think I gained weight when I feel off the wagon.  So I'm back at it, today was day one and so far so good.

What I've Eaten:  This is breakfast and lunch, it's not time for dinner at the time of post.
3 pears
2 apples
2 clementines
beef stew with turnip, parsnip, potato, carrots and of course beef.

Why do I do the things I do?

I was doing very well staying away from the sugar from my last post until Halloween!  Urg, Halloween caused a binge.  Could have made it through too as I didn't buy any candy for myself as in previous years but at the end of the night my superintendent gave me to left over baggies of candy, I should have said no.  I don't know why I didn't say no.  So the binge began as apparently I have no will power when it comes to this stuff. 

Now it's time to leave it in the past and start new.  It's November so the pumpkin spice muffins should be out of the stores any day now, I hope.  My friend Natalie told me about "Fresh" a place I can buy sugar free and gluten free goodies.  Which I will be trying for sure.  So I start fresh Nov 2nd as the rest is history.

Yesterday Nov 1st.
1 medium coffee
1 pumpkin spice muffin
3 apples
1 pear
3 oz white turkey meat
half a potato
slice of cranberry loaf
Mom's home made chicken noodle soup
Then an apple blossom and ice cream.  Apparently I can't hang out with people eatting sugar eighter.  Funny thing is my Mom cooked it special for me.  Actually I know why she did and it was very sweet of her.

Holloween
Too embaressing to talk about.  I hang my head in shame.

October 30th
1 medium coffee
1 pumpkin spice muffin
toasted tomato sandwhich with miracle whip
turkey schnitzel
1 baked beat
roasted vegies (squash, sweet potato, broccoli).